Mia Dancey^[1]European Interdisciplinary Master African Studies (EIMAS)., Barbara Igler^[2]European Interdisciplinary Master African Studies (EIMAS). & Mariajosé Amaral^[3]European Interdisciplinary Master African Studies (EIMAS).

Abstract:

This short story explores the ethics and problematics of voluntourism given that it claims to address global inequality but can inadvertently reinforce global power dynamics. Voluntourism involves some combination of volunteering and touristic activities, though typically with a larger focus on the latter. Current forms of voluntourism often involve a sending organisation, usually based in the Global North, placing volunteers in host organisations usually in the Global South. This short story explores the tensions at play between volunteers, hosts, and the representatives of sending organisations. It follows the narratives of three women working in a Mozambican voluntourism group called Wani (a fictional organisation). The interactions between the three women and their internal narratives reveal the complicated negotiations involved in voluntourism. The short story is grounded in academic literature. However, the narrative is also rich in symbolism and metaphor, beyond its academic grounding.

Keywords: Voluntourism; Narrative; Global South; Intercultural Communication; Development Education.

Introduction

This short  story seeks to explore the ethics and problematics of voluntourism, a form of development cooperation. Voluntourism involves some combination of volunteering and touristic activities, with international volunteering placing more focus on the volunteer elements and voluntourism emphasising the touristic aspects (McGehee, 2014). Current forms of voluntourism often involve a sending organisation, usually based in the Global North, that will identify and place volunteers in various host organisations across the world – mostly in the Global South (Raymond, 2012). These organisations can be non-profits or for-profit, and vary in size. Different organisations have different forms and levels of cooperation, which will be examined within the story.

This short story explores the tensions at play between volunteers, hosts, and the representatives of sending organisations. It follows the narratives of three women working in a Mozambican voluntourism group called Wani (the group is inspired by a real volunteering organisation in Vilankulo, but the depiction of Wani in this narrative is purely fictional). The interactions between the three women and their internal narratives reveal the complicated negotiations involved in voluntourism. The short story is grounded in academic literature and references relevant and reliable sources on the topics. However, the narrative is also rich in symbolism and metaphor, beyond its academic grounding. We encourage the reader to ponder the layers of meaning held within this story, and examine how the characters reflect one another, and personalities one may have encountered in real life.

Chapter 1 – Luisa

When I waved my family goodbye at the airport in Munich, I was prepared for an incredible time. Four weeks in the beautiful village of Vilankulo, Mozambique. I couldn’t be happier for my gap year to finally start. Imagining myself in the clear blue Indian Ocean washing the dust and dirt away after a lovely day of building schools as a volunteer. I could already see myself together with my new friends from across the world catching the waves^[4]Sin (2009) sees fun, adventure, and getting in touch with people from all over the world as important motivation for people to join volunteer programmes..

“Flight Number QTR7538 to Doha is ready for boarding.” The mechanical voice of the boarding crew member brought me back to the airport from my daydream. The trip to Vilankulo was going to take forever. I couldn’t stop thinking about everything that was waiting for me. I have heard so much about the positives of spending some time in Africa, especially when you spend some time volunteering. Volunteering in a country you have never been before, on a continent you have never visited before, where the people speak languages you can’t even imagine^[5]The decision to participate in a volunteer programme is often driven by the desire to experience adventurous and “authentic encounters” (Benson & Seibert, 2009; Sin, 2009).. I was so ready for my adventurous and life changing gap year.

The trip to Vilankulo took forever, but I spent most of the time sleeping on my first flight from Munich to Doha. On the flight from Doha to Maputo it was a bit different. The atmosphere in the plane was nothing like the calm and relaxing vibe I experienced on the first flight. A lot of black men in suits stared and hammered on the keyboards of their laptops, some young African women wearing the most colourful dresses I have ever seen, who didn’t care that their numerous children were constantly annoying other passengers by running through the narrow hallway or waiting in line for the bathroom for the fifth time in three hours, talked and shouted at each other and it really felt like they just came straight up from their local market. I was not surprised by this, I guessed this is what you get on a flight to Africa^[6]This scene demonstrates that (negative) stereotypes and a generalisation of the African continent and people are also reproduced by people who are most likely to be thought of as non-racist and shows … Continue a ler. Because I couldn’t sleep anyway, I started reading into the folders, flyers and colourful little booklets with all these cute little African children on it, that I received from my volunteering agency.

For my last flight, I took a very small plane from Maputo to Vilankulo. I was lucky to get a window seat and decided to stare out of the window for my whole flight to see as much as possible from this beautiful country. After the bumpiest take-off I have ever experienced, I could feel someone’s eyes on me. I turned my head and looked into the eyes of a young man who was probably the same age as me. “Hey, I am João, it looks like you have never been on a plane like this”, he said teasingly. Before I could answer, he started talking again. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be rude.” “It’s all right” I replied as kindly as I could, “I’m Luisa and this is my first time in Africa, I’m coming as a volunteer and I’m going to build schools in Vilankulo.” João’s eyebrows twitched in surprise, curtly he asked about the organisation I would be here with. I excitedly told him about Wani and showed him the small booklets with the smiling children on it. He seemed to be thinking about what to answer and an awkward silence spread between us. All at once he smiled again and asked with interest, “How did you come up with the idea of flying to Vilankulo?” That was exactly the right question. “Oh, you know, I don’t even know where to start. I’ve always wanted to go away on my own for a long time. I was always at home with my family and now I’ve finished school and I just want to see what I’m capable of^[7]During her interviews Sin (2009) found out that it is very common that volunteers’ motivation comes from their desire to prove themselves and show that they are capable of doing something … Continue a ler. I want to find my strengths and grow beyond myself^[8]As described by Benson and Seibert (2009), personal growth is one of the push factors for volunteer tourists. Volunteer work is seen as a possibility to develop one’s confidence as well as to train … Continue a ler, get to know new things, see and experience how people live here. I’m interested in the culture and I also want to try the food. I want to live life like you do^[9]This refers to the motivation of travelling. By doing volunteer work the participants believe to get much more insights and see the “real” culture and people’s lives than by being a … Continue a ler.” I noticed myself getting faster and faster. João interrupted me, “But then why don’t you just take a backpack and travel around the country?” His question made me wonder. I hesitated for a moment, I had to think. “Well, I have it so good at home and now I want to help others to have a better life. It’s important that children can go to school, and I want to contribute to that. I want to make a positive difference and do something good^[10]Contributing to make the world a better place is a very altruistic motivation which is found with most participants. The decision for doing volunteer work is led by the idea of helping the community … Continue a ler.”

After disembarking, I lost sight of João, but our conversation remained in my head until my big black suitcase appeared on the squeaky conveyor belt. Du hast ihm nicht die ganze Wahrheit gesagt, Luisa^[11]“You didn’t tell the whole truth, Luisa.”, said a voice in my head. The voice was right. My thirst for adventure and my urge to help were not the only reasons. I wanted the volunteer programme to make me stand out a bit from the others at my age. When my future employer holds my CV in his hands, they would be thrilled by my commitment. It would illustrate my ability to work in a team and show that I am willing to lend a hand.^[12]Another reason for participating in volunteering is to show interest in civic engagement and the positive attributions of someone’s character which come with this kind of engagement. It is thought … Continue a ler I grabbed my incredibly heavy suitcase and headed for the exit. A woman named Maria would be waiting for me, I was told.

Chapter 2 – Gen

As I stepped out of the large Toyota, the wall of hot, humid Mozambican air hit my face. It was thirty-two degrees and what felt like one thousand percent humidity, under the thick tropical canopy. Wiping the sweat from my eyes, I took a look around the humble encampment of the Wani volunteer centre. The camp was composed of a few roughly constructed wooden cabins bordering a smattering of dirt tracks.

“Mrs Liebenburg! Welcome.” A large, dark woman in a brown t-shirt with the orange logo of the organisation bustled forward. She smiled warmly and proffered her hand, “Welcome, Mrs Liebenburg, to Wani. We are very happy to have you.”

“Maria!” I shook the woman’s hand in both of my own. “How pleased I am to finally meet you. We have heard such good things. But please, call me Gen, all my friends do.”

“Thank you, Mrs… Thank you, Gen.” Maria corrected herself. “It is a pleasure to finally meet in person^[13]Raymond (2012) recommends that the most effective and ethical sending volunteer organisations, like the one Gen works for, should have a strong relationship with the host organisation. Though Raymond … Continue a ler and have you visit Vilankulo. Do you need help with your bags, madam?”

“Oh no, I left all my belongings back at the hotel^[14]This piece of dialogue reflects some of the criticisms against voluntourism made by Levy in her 2020 New Yorker article, A Missionary on Trial. Levy criticises volunteers in Africa for having much … Continue a ler.”

“Are you not staying with us, madam?” Maria’s brow furrowed.

“No, I’m afraid not.” I replied, putting on a pout of disappointment. “I couldn’t bear to come here without aircon. My, I’m sweating through my clothes at this point!” I laughed and flapped my blazer about myself. “And anyways, I’m only here for the day I’m afraid.”

A look of surprise crossed Maria’s face. “Just for the day?” She asked, a note of surprise in her Portuguese-accented English.

“Sadly, yes,” I shook my head in feigned sadness. As if I could stand this rural village for any longer, I thought to myself.

“But madam, Miss Gen, what about the meeting? And who are these other men you brought with you? I thought you were just coming to survey the volunteer site?” The questions poured from Maria as she gestured to the team that had slipped out of the Toyota and was already unpacking expensive camera equipment.

“This is the camera crew!” I waved to the men and called over the Portuguese director, Renaldo. “There’s been a change of plan, Maria. Corporate doesn’t just want a review of the volunteer site. We’re looking to boost our image^[15]Smith and Font (2014) argue that voluntourism organisations often employ greenwashing in their marketing strategies. Their marketing strategies focus heavily on the touristic elements of … Continue a ler – get the company back out there after the damage from Covid^[16]The UK’s National Council for Voluntary Organisations (NCVO) reported, in 2021, that 36% of volunteer organisations saw a decline in volunteering participants as a result of the pandemic, and that … Continue a ler. So, I hired Renaldo here to shoot some pieces of footage for us.”

Maria’s response was cut short as Renaldo proffered his hand, and Maria shook it, the pair exchanging some quick words in Portuguese. I smiled uncomfortably at the sudden change of language^[17]Thiong’o (1986) writes about the hegemony of the English language and how native African languages have become deferent to the predominance of English. In this scene, Gen shows her discomfort … Continue a ler, before turning back to Maria, “Renaldo and the team will just go around taking some photos and shooting some video for us!”

Maria shuffled uncomfortably, “Miss Gen, I had hoped we could speak in private. We have some concerns we’ve been meaning to raise with the head office.

“Not to worry,” I waved away Maria’s comment. “We can walk and talk, can’t we?” I started towards the volunteer camp, where a variety of twenty-something European boys and girls could be seen chatting and milling about.

Maria hastened to follow me – a rather easy task given the way my high heels were slowly sinking into the camp’s sandy dirt track. “Miss Gen,” the woman continued, “I was hoping to speak with you about the volunteers you’re sending to Wani.”

“Yes, such lovely, hard-working kids!” I beamed at the faces that greeted us from the cabins. Renaldo and his crew were already moving through the camp, filming and photographing the volunteers. “Smile, everyone! This is for our website.” I called.

“But Miss Gen, they are very nice young people, but they’re not what we need. They have no training or skill background, they don’t speak Portuguese, and very few have an experience working in education^[18]Raymond (2012) advises that sending organisations should be very selective with their choice of volunteers. They should be sure that volunteers are proficient in the local language and reasonably … Continue a ler. We just…”

“Come now, Maria.” I interrupted placatingly, turning to the frazzled Mozambican. “They are educated, are they not? All the volunteers are over 18 and all have likely finished high school – in Europe, no less^[19]In this dialogue, Gen reveals another pitfall identified by Raymond (2012): when the volunteer is perceived as the expert. Raymond advises that volunteers should behave with humility and acknowledge … Continue a ler. They would have lots to impart to the kiddies here.”

“But the language barrier, madam.” Maria insisted, “The volunteers do not speak Portuguese, let alone Xitswa. And the children here don’t speak any English.”

“Well, that’s why they will learn. Please, Maria, this isn’t such a big deal. We can make a plan; every little bit goes a long way^[20]Once again, Gen is perpetuating her neoliberal outlook. Gascón (2012) speaks about the ‘pro-poor tourism’ which, according to Sin (2009), is a strong ideological motivator behind voluntourism. … Continue a ler!” I turned away to direct Renaldo and his team, but a determined Maria followed me.

“Please, Miss Gen, if we could just allocate some funds for teaching staff, there are excellent members of the community who want educational training and who could really help fill these schools. We just need the funds from head-office.”

I had to refrain myself from rolling my eyes, Always about the money. “You know our budget constraints, Maria.” I plastered on a conciliatory smile, “This is why we work with volunteers.” I stressed the word.

I saw frustration flash across Maria’s face, and I decided on a different track. “Look, Maria, you have a nice set-up here – better than most of the places I visit!” I moved to touch her arm. “And look what you’ve done; you’ve built a beautiful school for the local children, and they will always be grateful to you^[21]McGehee and Andereck (2012) raise the troubling notion that volunteers want to be thanked for their efforts, which creates a power imbalance and raises a sense of dependence..”

Maria nodded, looking resigned. “Thank you, Miss Gen.”

“And we will help you with whatever you need!” I smiled, patting Maria on the shoulder. “Meanwhile, let’s get some lovely shots of this magical jungle village^[22]White saviours are at risk of romanticising the communities in which they work, as seen in the article by Levy (2020)..” I said, turning back to the volunteers who were posing for Renaldo.

Why didn’t we just shoot this in the studio back home? I asked myself as I brushed another trickle of sweat out my eyes. We need the money-shot. Someone young, and pretty, with the locals – just to show how much we care^[23]Sin and He (2019) mention the “aesthetics of poverty” in describing how voluntourists take photos of local people they encounter while volunteering. These aesthetics often trivialise poverty and … Continue a ler.

“Maria,” I snapped my fingers at the woman who had been conversing with one of Renaldo’s crewmen off to the side^[24]Once again, Gen reveals her discomfort at others’ use of languages she does not know, revealing the colonial dimensions of language in which the predominance and presumed superiority of English … Continue a ler. “Don’t you want to take us to the school so we can get some good shots of the volunteers hard at work! And maybe a few with those darling little African children they’re here to help^[25]Voluntourists often describe local, particularly African, children as ‘happy’ and ‘smiling’ (Sin & He, 2019). These representations are influenced by internalised dominant narratives that … Continue a ler.”

Maria’s smile looked rather forced when she replied, “Of course, Miss Gen. Follow me.”

The counsellor called to the volunteers to lead us to the school building site close by. The buildings, still under construction, were little more than bare concrete walls. But on our arrival, a group of excited African children burst through the brush to join the rush of activity around the volunteers. Cheers and laughter erupted from the children as they congregated around a pretty blond girl who smiled and twirled her loose skirt for the children’s delight.

   This is what it’s all about! Giving back to the underprivileged^[26]Promotional photographs on voluntourism websites reveal the visual economy that support voluntourism (Grimm & Needham, 2012). ‘Shallow’ voluntourism projects rely especially heavily on … Continue a ler, I thought. I loved seeing the children’s cheerful faces light up as the girl, in a light German accent, began teasing them and calling them by name. These children have no idea of the opportunity they have here^[27]Once again, Gen shows her view that beneficiaries of volunteer activities should find themselves grateful for what they receive (McGehee & Andereck, 2012)., I thought as I smiled sympathetically at their worn clothing, covered in dust and faded from the sun.

“Just like that!” Renaldo called, squatting with his camera to get a better shot of volunteer amidst the children. I wonder if we can get some props, something to show the educational value of the program, I thought.

I wandered away from the action towards one of the almost-finished buildings in which stood a pile of boxes marked ‘Donations’^[28]Zell and Thierry (2015) present a comprehensive review of the market for book donations, noting that most relate to educational material and that African libraries are severely under-resourced. … Continue a ler. Inside I found stacks of textbooks, still wrapped in plastic. I grasped one and turned it over. 2023. The book was a recent publication. Unopened.

Anger boiled up inside me. They’ve had these textbooks all this time and they haven’t used them? And Maria has the audacity to ask me for funding for teachers!

I stalked over to Maria. “Maria, please tell me why these textbooks are unused? Why have you not opened them?” I thrust out the book towards her.

Breathing deeply, Maria took the book from my hands, looking it over. “These are English textbooks, madam.”

“So?”

“So, the children cannot read them. They speak Portuguese.”

“But they should be learning English.” I insisted. “This program is meant to teach students basic English and mathematics. Normal primary school stuff!” I threw up my hands in exasperation. By now, the crowd gathered around the camera crew had fallen silent.

“Yes, madam. But English is not required at the primary school level in Mozambique. Students are required to learn Portuguese first^[29]Zell and Thierry (2015) note that there is a growing determination for donations to contain only new books. However, there remains the issue that many of these books are divorced from the African … Continue a ler.”

“But English is important! These children deserve to learn a relevant language that can be used anywhere. And they know Portuguese anyway.”

“Most students don’t speak Portuguese at home.” Maria explained, patiently.

“But these were donations.” I insisted. “They cannot go to waste! You should be grateful to have these brand-new textbooks.”

“And what do you expect us to do with them, madam?” An edge of frustration entered Maria’s voice.

“Use them for…” I grasped for an appropriate idea, “something!” I finished, exasperatedly. “Whatever. The point is, you cannot let donations sit away in some half-built hut when they could be put to use.”

“This hut,” Maria stressed the word, “is going to be the main hall of our new school. And we have perfectly adequate supplies from our government as soon as we can attest to the functionality of the school. We plan to re-donate these textbooks to the English high school in Inhambane, where they will be put to better use.”

“Fine then.” I stood up straighter and snatched the book from Maria’s hands. “But for now, we’ll use this one in our promotional footage.” I retreated back to German girl and the children who had fallen silent at our discussion.

I plastered on a smile, feeling the sweat sticking down the creases of my face, “Come on, kids! Who wants to take some nice photos?”

Chapter 3 – Luisa

I could sense that Maria has had a tough day because of this lady called Gen who had been around her constantly throughout the day. Asking Maria to have a dinner at her favourite restaurant in Vilankulo would be a great idea to relax and end the day on a good note. Maria agreed and we started walking.

From some distance I could already make out the restaurant. It was the only house lit by lights, and loud music was blaring from it. Arriving on the terrace of the restaurant, I saw all the plastic chairs thrown together, standing wildly around individual wooden tables. The owner greeted us in a friendly way and Maria and he exchanged a few words. This is the real Vilankulo^[30]It is very common for volunteers to romanticise the place and the people where they do their volunteer work. This romanticisation can be seen as part of a neo-colonial construct in the field of … Continue a ler, I thought to myself immediately. We sat down and the owner quickly brought us local beer.

At the beginning, Maria seemed more reserved than usual. I didn’t bring it up, though, and told her about my life at home and my interests instead. After a few bottles of beer, the music was turned up louder and the other guests in the little restaurant asked us to dance. I didn’t know this kind of music and I didn’t have a feeling for moving my body to it. Maria and the others were obviously having fun dancing. I was impressed by their movements.

After a while, we sat down again. Maria seemed visibly more relaxed and began to explain to me who the other guests were. “You see this man? He is the son of a man who is one of the village elders. His father does a lot for our village and is very wise. He teaches the children many important things for their lives.”

I was puzzled; if he was so important to the children’s education, why wasn’t he involved in Wani’s school projects?

Maria sighed slightly desperately. “Wani is not interested in his knowledge. He doesn’t teach Maths, Portuguese or English. He teaches knowledge about our ancestors, but also practical things about farming and fishing^[31]This scene shows that the volunteer organisations from the Global North are not interested in what the community really needs, but just try to work in the same way as the would in the Global North … Continue a ler. The children love him very much.”

“Oh, but these are things we volunteers know nothing about. Do you actually need us then?” I echoed sadly and resignedly. Maria rocked her foot slightly unsteadily and let one of the empty bottles circle between her fingers.

“Oh Luisa, it’s very complicated. It’s nice when there are young people who are interested in our country and I like doing my job, but sometimes it’s difficult…”

“I don’t understand. Can you explain? I would like to understand…” Maria interrupted me and I noticed an annoyed undertone in her voice. “Look, Luisa, I don’t want to hurt your feelings, you are an insanely nice and kind person…”

“But…?” I inquired. Maria didn’t say anything and somehow, I felt like I went too far, asked too much, wanted too many insights. Ich will doch wirklich nur helfen. Ich möchte niemandem etwas Böses tun. Ich bin hier um zu lernen, nicht um etwas kaputt zu machen oder durcheinander zu bringen. Ich sehe doch, dass die Menschen hier Hilfe brauchen und die möchte ich ihnen geben^[32]“I really only want to help. I don’t want to hurt anyone. I am here to learn, not to ruin or mess things up. I can see that the people here need help and I want to offer it to them.”.

We sat there for a while, and it was getting late. Our conversation seemed to really concern her, but I didn’t dare say anything. I didn’t even look at her, but stared into my half-empty beer bottle, hoping for a reaction from her. Maria cleared her throat, and I looked at her tensely. “What do you think you have learned so far?” She looked at me with her big brown eyes and I got the feeling that she was trying to look directly into my soul.

“Hm…” I wasn’t prepared for this question. “I think I’m really learning to rise above myself here. After just two weeks, I noticed how this whole experience has an impact on my personality. I learned to make decisions on my own, to take responsibility. I’m finding out how I behave when I work in a large team with many different people. I think it’s all very important for me^[33]Luisa’s sentiments show what positive impacts volunteering can have on the participants. It demonstrates the possibility for personal development and the opportunity for self-realisation. This can … Continue a ler.” I paused for a while, thinking. I felt that Maria was trying to give me space. Space for my thoughts to sink in. She was silent and said nothing, as if she knew I hadn’t finished my monologue.

“I don’t know, I don’t want this to sound stupid, but I feel like this time confirms for me what I want to do with my future. It shows me that I like to help people who don’t have it as easy as me and stand by their side. I have so much at home, and I want to give something back^[34]This is a very typical phrasing for volunteers and shows that their intentions are driven by the white saviour complex, as described in the article by Levy (2020) about Renée Bach..” I wanted to continue speaking, but Maria rolled her eyes slightly. It felt like she didn’t want me to see it, but it was too late. I fell silent, only to ask a second later, what was so bad about it.

“You know Luisa, that’s exactly the problem. I don’t want to badmouth all of this. This is my job. I need this job, my family needs this job, but when I hear something like that, it’s hard to balance everything inside me.”

“But what’s wrong with wanting to help people?”

“Helping is not bad,” Maria nodded placatingly. Neither of us said anything. Seconds suddenly felt like minutes, time didn’t seem to pass.

“Have you ever heard of the term white saviour?” I just shook my head mutely. “It’s when people from the Global North, for example Germany, come to our country to help us because they think they know better what we need and how we should live. They are not even trained in the field they are working at^[35]What can be found with white saviours is not only the feeling of needing to help, but also going into fields they don’t know anything about but still behave like they know it better (Levy, 2020). … Continue a ler…”

“But I don’t think I know better” I looked at her desperately.

“You may not see it, but deep down inside, you might. The problem is that it’s not something that has just happened recently. It comes from History, from colonialism. Back then, Europeans came to Africa, and they thought they had to save the inhabitants and ‘civilise’ them, and the same thing is still happening now. You come to help here. You continue this^[36]As mentioned, voluntourism can be seen as a continuity of colonialism (Bandyopadhyay, 2019)..”

By now I had tears in my eyes. Das kann doch gar nicht sein. Ich will den Menschen ja nichts Böses. Das war nie meine Absicht irgendjemandem zu zeigen, dass ich besser bin und die Dinge besser weiß^[37]“That can’t be possible. I do not mean to harm people. That was never my intention to show anyone that I am better and know things better.”.

I took a moment to collect my thoughts and was then ready to answer. “You know, I’ve never heard of all this before. Back home we only hear good things about volunteer tourism. That you learn so many new things and that it is just incredibly fulfilling to help here^[38]Within colonial History, writing about the colonised countries became very popular, not only by the colonial government, but also by travellers. A romantic gaze was established through this. The … Continue a ler. But, yes, maybe you are right. You must know it best, you live here, you work here, you are the expert.”

“Well, unfortunately, not everyone sees it that way.” I was puzzled at Maria’s snappy tone.

“What do you mean?” I asked, wondering what she could mean.

“It’s not like there are only bad programmes. You see, I like my work and I would like to improve things here, but with Gen it’s not possible. I know what the community needs, and if we let the people from the village have a voice in the decision-making process, then we can decide together which projects make sense. It would be important that only people who are suitable come, who bring expertise from their profession and stay longer. So, what I mean is, they need to come at least for a year, or even longer^[39]This shows that Maria does not view volunteering as completely wrong, but to make it work, the programmes need to be demand-led by the communities and not by the organisation from the Global North … Continue a ler, but Gen doesn’t listen at all. I tried again today, but she is only interested in economic gain. That’s the big problem, unfortunately.”

“What is the big problem?” I listened very attentively, wanting to get as much out of this conversation as I could.

“This neoliberal mindset just makes everything worse for us, but for the organisations it is very important. It reinforces the dichotomies we already have. The dichotomy between ‘developed’ and ‘underdeveloped’, between ‘us’ and ‘the others’. The power imbalance between Gen and me or the power imbalance between you as a volunteer and the people in the village who receive the help^[40]Power relations are a very important part in the volunteering industry. Because it promotes helping “the poor”, it makes the host community inferior to the volunteers. The narratives … Continue a ler.” Maria fell silent. I sensed there was so much more to her. The pain of having to balance it all. The pressure on her that she herself is part of all of this because it is her job.

“I don’t know what to say to that. It’s all so new and it turns everything upside down.”

“You don’t have to say anything, Luisa.” Her voice soothed me and was as gentle as ever. But it couldn’t be. It wasn’t Maria’s job to calm me down after all that had just happened.

I felt like I was only getting a glimpse of all this and yet I was on the verge of tears. How could Maria do this every day and be the most good-natured and kind person in the world to us volunteers?

By now it was late and the owner was hinting at closing the restaurant. We paid and made our way back through the starry night.

Chapter 4 – Maria

I waved goodbye to Luisa at the airport. She turned and said, “Maria, we’ll see each other soon. I promise to learn Portuguese next time.” I was sad to see her go; she’d opened up to me in a way Gen hadn’t. I thought back to when Luisa and I met.

Four weeks had gone by since I first saw her. When i picked her up, she was part of the new group of young European volunteers. Quantos achavam que fariam a diferença em apenas algumas semanas. Eles vêm, centenas de jovens europeus e norte-americanos, e logo voltam aos seus países de clima frio, e comida sem sabor^[41]“How many of them had come thinking that they could make a difference in just a few weeks. They come, hundreds of young Europeans and from the United States, and then go back to their countries of … Continue a ler. I stretched my neck trying to find Luisa. Expiam o seu privilégio com as crianças dacomunidade^[42]Cole (The Atlantic, 2012) says white saviour complex “is about having a big emotional experience that validates privilege.”, com as nossas crianças, e depois ficamos com os nossos problemas e escolas sem professores, edifícios fantasmas, novas ruínas da cidade^[43]“They atone their privilege with the children of the community, with our children, and then we are left with our problems and schools without teachers, ghost buildings, new city ruins”.. I remember thinking while holding Luisa’s name in my hands. She appeared in the crowd extending her hand and introduced herself. I realised she was just a 19-year-old child that wanted to help.

We walked to my car. Luisa talked about her flight and how eager she was to meet the children and help those in need^[44]This is a reference to the multiple similar statements that Renné Bach made in interviews and which are summarised in the article “A Missionary on Trial” (Levy, 2020). Bandyopadhyay and … Continue a ler,^[45]Sin (2009), found in his interviews that for many volunteers the “key motivators often revolve around the ‘self’, most explicitly stated in section headers starting with ‘I want to…’. … Continue a ler I couldn’t help but wonder if she was trying to find herself, at such a young age, building a nice C.V. to apply to some European school. She was, ultimately, building her identity in contraposition to us, to everything she thought she wasn’t^[46]Fanon (1986), writes: “It would seem, indeed, that (…) white and black represent two poles of a world, two poles in perpetual conflict (…) white or black, that is the question. / I am … Continue a ler.

In just a few days she was making friends with other volunteers. She learned the basics of building, but I was worried these kids didn’t have any proper training. It was evident that most of them haven’t done this kind of job before. I used to wonder if they regretted coming here and if their idealised vision of Africa had been shattered.

One morning I received an email from Munich’s office. They were sending a woman: Genevieve Liebenburg, to survey the volunteer site. The mail closed with: “I am eager to meet you, the beautiful land of Vilankulo and to live a true African experience! Warm regards, Gen”. I felt uneasy; the company had never sent anyone before. What were the reasons for the sudden decision? Talvez queiram reestruturar o projeto de voluntariado. Talvez vão cortar o orçamento ou mesmo cancelar o programa. Não dá para saber^[47]“Maybe they want to restructure the volunteer project. Maybe they will cut the budget or even cancel the program. There is no way of knowing.”. But it was an opportunity to tell her in person all of the improvements that could be made. She was arriving in a few days. I have sent requests to the head office before, dozens of emails where I explained what the community needed and some possible solutions, but they said things were fine the way they were^[48]The discourse of “gratefulness” is one way of representing the perpetuation of colonial power dynamics..

Gen arrived at midday. I heard the Toyota from a distance. They parked and I saw a heel slowly sinking into the mud. I had arranged a nice room where she could spend the night. “Welcome to Wani, Mrs Liebenburg. We are very happy to have you!” I said, in my best accent. I’ve never felt comfortable speaking English. I feel something of my personality disappears. I had even asked Luisa previously the proper way to pronounce Gen’s last name. She was kind enough to help me practise it until it came out decently^[49]Maria’s preoccupation with her level of English is a sign of the hierarchical and ideological systems that manifest through language and are part of a legacy of colonial structures of power and … Continue a ler.

I was disappointed when Gen told me she wasn’t staying the night with us, but returning to her hotel. Then I was surprised when a “camera crew” led by Renaldo came out of the Toyota. Renaldo, a nice man from Maputo, and I quickly became friends. His grandparents were from Vilankulo. His parents had migrated to the capital looking for a job in the factories. He was born there and was going to take this trip as an opportunity to visit his grandparents, whom he had not seen for many years.

That night I took Renaldo and the rest of the camera crew to have some food. The meeting with Mrs. Liebenburg didn’t go well. She was not open to hearing the real needs of the community. Within a few hours I knew that the Munich office didn’t care about anything happening in Wani. They just wanted to get shots for the promotional video, recordings that portrayed us the way foreigners like to see Africa represented. White boys and girls smiling next to black children and in the background, the sunlight through the branches of the trees. The multicultural picture by excellence, with all the gender and racial quotas filled.

I will never forget what Gen told me when I took her back to my office; she said it resembled a “magical jungle village”^[50]Stereotypes, according to Lippman (1922), are: “knowledge structures that serve as mental pictures of the groups in question” (p. 2). In the case of African societies, the stereotype surrounding … Continue a ler. I felt so vulnerable, uncomfortable and angry. Was this the person who was leading the volunteering project? I decided to let it go, but I couldn’t help to ask myself: Por que é que tenho sempre de me adaptar^[51]“Why do I always have to adapt?”? I stopped myself holding back my thoughts: Não sejas injusta, Maria. Gen não o faz com más intenções, apenas por ignorância^[52]“Don’t be unfair, Maria. Gen doesn’t do it with bad intentions, only out of ignorance”.,^[53]Achebe (1988) wrote: “If there is something in these utterances more than youthful inexperience, more than a lack of factual knowledge, what is it? Quite simply it is the desire – one might … Continue a ler. But maybe that was the problem. Gen wasn’t aware of how disrespectful she was replicating an image of Africa that was made out of hurtful stereotypes. As duas somos mulheres, mas não somos iguais, não vivemos a mesma realidade^[54]“We are both women, but we are not the same, we don’t live the same reality”.,^[55]As Albuquerque (Euronews, 2021) writes: “While the patriarchy set gender roles for the white bourgeois women in the private sphere, with the excuse that they should be protected, non-white, black, … Continue a ler.

After I met with Gen, I ran into Luisa. She noticed my change of mood and was interested in understanding my discomfort. I tried to explain to her what white saviours were. I told her that it wasn’t something premeditated, that she didn’t notice it because it went back to colonial times. She told me she just wanted to help people who were not as lucky as her. She had said it so much I was beginning to believe she was repeating a speech she thought was the right one. Esse discurso esconde coisas de que ela não está consciente, I thought.^[56]Bandyopadhyay (2019) writes that: “Contemporary depoliticized social causes such as ‘volunteer tourism’ to save and help the people in the Global South – the main purpose of this discourse … Continue a ler

Helping others is not always as simple as it seems. I remembered something an old man from the village once told me, that the white saviour syndrome, Tem a tendência para tornar as pessoas de cor incapazes de se ajudarem a si próprias. Faz parecer que as pessoas de cor não se podem ajudar, como se não tivéssemos a habilidade e os recursos. Escamoteiam a nossa história, silenciam a nossa voz e fazem com que cada sucesso pareça acontecer por causa deles, por causa dos brancos^[57]“It makes it seem as if people of colour can’t help themselves, as if we don’t have the ability or the resources. They take away our history, our voice and make every success seem to … Continue a ler,^[58]As Cammarota (2001), wrote: “The white savior syndrome has the tendency to render people of color incapable of helping themselves – infantile or helpless victims who survive by instinct. People … Continue a ler. I told Luisa how local wisdom was not being appreciated because it was not “scientific”, it didn’t fit the modern, Euro-American way of teaching and learning. They were not valid.

When the camera crew did the final recordings, Gen stormed in, screaming and pointing at an English textbook she was holding. She questioned me about those donations and said we couldn’t let the books rot in that half-built hut. I was angry, but tried to explain to her that the kids didn’t speak English, some of them didn’t even speak Portuguese, and that they also weren’t biochemists.

We said goodbye. She seemed relieved to go back to Munich. She said she would report back to the head office that everything was running in a lovely way and how glad she was that we could both agree that everything could be fixed with what was already there in Wani, and that it was going to be music to the head office’s ears.

Luisa stayed until the volunteering ended. After our conversation, she became curious and started learning from the children and the elders. She memorised some words in Xítsua and Portuguese. Luisa was one of the few volunteers I met while working in Wani who was truly engaging with the people of Vilankulo. She made me think that volunteering could be an open door for young women to broaden their perspective on working with communities.

My hands were still on the wheel and the sunset had passed. I saw an airplane crossing the night sky, elevating and disappearing in the clouds. I imagined Luisa sitting there, talking to some boy about the things she had lived here, planning for the next trip, practicing her Xítsua so it would engrave into her brain. The air coming in from the car window was warm and I was very close to home.

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